Sculpture by Charles Ray shown at The Art Institute of Chicago
Sometimes I feel like the statue above. Alone and naked, baring my soul for the world to examine. Thus it is so touching when those of you who find yourselves in similar positions reach out and let me know that I am not alone. That there are many others out there.
The following is a comment that I wanted to make sure got the voice that it deserves:
Hi Nadine, I commented on your most recent entry on the balance of power, but felt it would be helpful to share a thought here as well. My husband and I read your blog and as I said before, we find it helpful and comforting to see we are not alone. He is transgender, I have known for 10 years now and we have been married almost 20. It has not been easy but we are here, love each other very much and really like being together! Much like you and Jules. So often stories of couples seem to be very negative or just end and end badly. My husband lies along the gender spectrum and transitioning is not what he wants to do. Hence, the presence of folks along the spectrum. Folks like us, you, him are out there-just not enough stories. Reading your blog along with a couple others I have found have given me the courage to reach out and perhaps comfort myself, and reassure others that through this journey, there is optimism and good. I also wanted to let other spouses know they're not alone. You have a wonderful blog for folks! My husband most recently has struggled with a similar dilemma - dysphoria over aligning mentally and perhaps physically with how he feels. Not sure if I explained that right but in any case, he has decided that low dose hrt may be a reasonable option. The physical changes while they may be slight when they occur would be welcome by him but they scare me and him to some degree. That said, we have seen a doctor and spoken about our concerns, etc. I know that this may be the best option for him especially mentally. We continue to communicate and even with our fears-never perfect is it? - we are here and know we want to be here together! Anyway, I hope this helps. Helps us and your experiment is healthy and has given us insight. You too I hope!
Take care, V
This is such a powerful comment. I very much appreciate you taking the time V to reach out and leave such a moving note. It touched me very deeply.
And I think it is important to share here to try and make sure that everyone gets a chance to read it. It is important to know that we are not alone. That each of us is an individual, but not a lonely anomaly. There are lots of us out there, and it is important that we know we are not alone.
Connect with others.
Connect with yourself.
And connect with others.