Sunday, September 15, 2013

5 Tips for Being Out and About

1 - Head Up, Shoulders Back, and Boobs Out
Taller people tend to slouch.  And girls that are shy about their boobs tend to slump their shoulders.  But these two habits tend to make one look bad.  When you do not hold your head up high, it makes your neck look larger.  I don't know about your necks but my neck is large enough.  I frequently am quite guilty of this nasty little habit and am constantly reminding myself to keep my head up.  I am proud and keeping my head up shows it as well as makes my neck look smaller, woo-hoo!

Part of dressing as a girl is to wear boobs, but funny enough I am often shy about having them.  I think it is funny as when I first started going out and about I was super shy about my boobs, maybe just like some younger girls.  Be proud of your breasts and put those shoulders back.  It makes your boobs look nicer, but also it helps your shoulders to look smaller.

I think these three things need work because many of us feel too big and we try and make ourselves look smaller, but by doing this we actually make ourselves look bigger.  So stand up tall, put your head up, your shoulders back, and stick your boobs out.

2 - Exude Confidence
This is super hard, but super important.  If you act act insecure then people will sense that and they will treat you differently.  Many people that you meet will feed off of your emotions.  If you act off a bit because you are embarrassed about how you are dressed, then people will tend to treat you off a bit.  You may then interpret that as the people have a problem with you because you are a guy dressed as a woman.  When I am at my utmost in confidence many people won't accept that I actually am a guy.

3 - Dress for the Situation
I like wearing whatever I want to wear, but wearing a fancy dress and super high heels is not always practical.  I will go out for several days at a time with nothing but girl clothes in tow.  I get up just about every morning and go on a walk.  That is a prime example of wearing tennis shoes and sweats as being far more appropriate than just about any dress I own.

I love all of my fancy clothes but I also am practical.  I like to try and be a bit stylish, even with my non-dressy clothes.  I like wearing dresses, but also skirts, and pants, and shorts, and sweats and all of the fun clothes that I bought from the female side of the store.

4 - Look but Don't Be Seen
When I am out I don't like looking at people but I also don't like not looking.  Not looking could be tricky, if I might encounter someone that I know, so I like to be aware of who is around me.  But I really don't like looking at people directly in the eye, unless I am dealing with them directly.  If I am talking with someone I look directly at them, as that is confident.  But if I am just walking around Target, I am not interested in looking at others directly as it makes me paranoid.  And it also makes it so I look less feminine.  Girls do not generally look random people in the eye, but they will look at you when you don't know it. That is what I generally do as well and it leaves me with good feelings.  Not sure why, but it does.

5 - Be Polite
I always try and be super nice and polite when I am dealing with the general public.  I have had to talk with a few managers regarding employee poor conduct, but I have always been polite to these folks.  I really try actually to be extra kind to everyone that I meet.  It makes for a much more pleasant experience with the public when you are the first one to put yourself out there and be nice.

- Jules is home.  She is doing better then we thought she would be at this point, but it will be a long road of recovery.  We both appreciate everyone's well wishes.  She will get better, one day at a time.  I consider us to have been quite lucky as it could have been much worse.
- She is my main concern at this point, dressing and blogging, are coming in way at the end at this point.  I will continue to dress when I can and write when I can, but so far with my work load tripling or quadrupling we shall see when that occurs.

Hope you all are well.
Love Ya!


  1. when she is strong enough and the dr's clear her she might consider some pool water therapy. as it works 2 groups of mussels at the same time with wondrous results for rebuilding mussel. with several cases including my mom ( an RN) it helped mores so than PT alone. many WMCA's have arthritis fitness pool programs where one is doing exercises in the warmed up pool water ( for the class) and some PT places have equipment in the water as well.
    good luck. she is strong enough to survive the fall so with that kind of determination hopefully she will get stronger quickly. i wish her well.

    1. Thanks for the well wishes Diana. Oh and yea, we are both big time swimmers, so I am sure that water therapy will be involved at some point.

      Thanks again.

  2. All of your points are great. While you do pass and can interact with civilian society there are many of us who do not pass. When I do get out I am becoming more and more comfortable being out and about as a man in a dress. As I interact with people I try to be confident and sure. If I am not ashamed to be who I am then no one can heap any shame on me.

    1. I don't think that passing or not has much to do with this, other than if you consider my tips and apply them you are more apt to pass. Many folks think I blend seamlessly, but passing is far more of a mindset than it is your appearance.

      Thanks Pat; good to read your thought provoking words!

  3. Hi Nadine,
    Well spoken. Confidence and being nice to people. What's not to like?
    Best wishes for your wife's recovery. Sometimes it takes a ghastly thing like that to show you what really matters.

    1. Thanks Penny!

      Yes I have been thinking quite a bit lately about what really matters.

  4. These are some great tips, Nadine. In fact these are all the things that helped me go out for the first time last year. All these things work together to prepare oneself to venture out in public. Preparing mentally and physically, with being mentally confident and picking an outfit that is appropriate and that makes one happy, comfortable, and confident are such important keys.

    I also have found myself not looking at people directly, unless if I'm interacting with them. I'm just minding my own business, acting as if there isn't anything out of the ordinary, enjoy myself with those close to me, and always with a smile on my face. It's the best way to go.

    My best wishes to Jules on her road to recovery.